Grounds For Divorce

For the past few days I can't seem to focus on anything else except for one question; how much does a friendship worth? Is it still a wise move to do all your best to keep a friend who might not appreciate what you've done? Maybe, but then you have to start questioning yourself as well; in this age & time, would everything still be worthy? I hate the answer to this, but let's face it. Friendship now doesn't hold the same meaning as it once did a decade ago or so.

Why am I saying this? Just look around you. Observe the people around you. What are they doing? Gossips, bad-mouthing, backstabbing.. You name it. All the sort of shits they're willing to do to make themselves look good & noble. And guess what? They are your friends, too. These infidels.. They deserve no better treatment than being torched & burned alive. Even Hell is too good for them.

Many times I find myself stumbling over the same situation over & over again; is he/she worth forgiving? Will he/she repeat his/her mistakes again? Well then, I just got my perfect solid answer lately. Forgiveness shouldn't be given more than once. Why? Let me explain.

Think. In a situation where you've just got backstabbed by a friend, what would you do? Maybe you'll confront this friend. Or maybe you might do the same back to him/her. But let's say you made the smarter decision & you chose to confront him/her, which indirectly portrayed the fact that you knew about him/her backstabbing you. What would this person do? Seek for forgiveness? Maybe. And let's say he's forgiven. Let's say you really don't wanna lose this friend of yours. How can you possibly tell that he/she won't do it again?

At this point, it all comes down to your trust. How much do you trust him/her in the first place to forgive him? And if you do trust this person a lot, then what would you do when he did it again? Do you still forgive him? I saw myself forgiving someone twice, but then this person wanted to prove me wrong. Twice, my friend, is more than enough to erase all my hopes & trust on you. You've been a good friend, but that's as far and as much as you can go and as you are. I'm truly disappointed.

I've learned this lesson the hard way. It also somehow affected the way I appreciate my friends. Some friends are worth being treated better than others, some are not. You managed to camouflage yourself within the people I trust. And this is the end of it. You know what they say about backstabbers like this; they put on a front that appears accommodating, loyal, and yes, even sacrificial. Then, without warning, they raise their knife, and by the time you see the glint of the blade, it's almost always too late. It is a little too late. Too late for you to repent. And because there is a larger awareness that transcends time and space, an awareness is available after death.

Be careful. Re-evaluate the points that you are looking for in a friend, and sort them out. Keep what you need, get rid of those you don't. It is difficult, but it can be done. In all likelihood, backstabbers are quite pleasant and supportive on the surface. But that's a mask. Remember, that friendship is not capable of ending, for if it ends it is only because it never existed.

And oh, of course. Never ever try to become a hypocrite by attacking other people personally if you wish to protect yourself. It's a waste of time, and you're dragging yourself down to their filthy level.

And I thought I could trust you.

Pathetic.

Elbow - Grounds For Divorce.

-MX-